Life Just Bounces don't you get worried at all. (A weblog of music and otrogenerica)

Monday, 28 June 2010

Why are the BBC, of all organisations, permitting 'however' splices?

Last year naturists lost a fight to keep Corton beach a designated naturist beach, however by-laws do not prohibit nude sun-bathing on the beach.

Dear Beeb news writers: you can't use "however" between two commas as you would "although". You need a semi-colon/full-stop and a comma, thus:

Last year naturists lost a fight to keep Corton beach a designated naturist beach. However, by-laws do not prohibit nude sun-bathing on the beach.
Last year naturists lost a fight to keep Corton beach a designated naturist beach; however, by-laws do not prohibit nude sun-bathing on the beach.

Dunno why this irks me so much, but i dare say i expect higher standards from the BBC. If they're still having trouble with this, they could always give me a news-writing job. i can do basic grammar and would even capitalise my own personal pronoun if necessary.

Song of the day: #12 Killdozer – "Knuckles the Dog (Who Helps People)"

WFMU is my favourite radio station in the world, but for some odd reason i never listened to the show Shut Up, Weirdo before this past couple of weeks, when i seem to have listened to about 20-odd episodes (odd being the operative word). Anyway, the SUW binge got me flicking through some of FMU's other webspaces. While browsing the 2010 marathon1 Flickr gallery, i was reminded of the genius of today's song of the day after seeing the Knuckles the Dog velvet painting:

i am so adopting this guy next year.

Anyway, "Knuckles the Dog (Who Helps People)" tells the moving story of the noble, loving hound depicted above, his friendship with the disabled boy whose life he saved, and his charitable works. Also, it has an ace title. It's from an album called Uncompromising War on Art Under the Dictatorship of the Proletariat, whose title is also ace. What's more, the song is also good, in an irresistible deadpan-gruff-heroism sort of way. Three for three!

mp3: Killdozer – "Knuckles the Dog (Who Helps People)" [YSI]

1 WFMU is wholly listener-supported, and their yearly two-week marathon involves the listeners pledging money to keep them afloat for another year. Impressively, they manage to take in a million dollars a year or thereabouts, which is probably testament to the slightly obsessive nature of the listeners.

Wednesday, 23 June 2010

"Rapper's 999 rants plague police" [with audio]

i've heard it said a lot recently that with the impending demise of the traditional music industry, artists are having to think of ever more canny and inventive ways to market themselves, but this takes the biscuit.

A rapper is tying up police emergency lines by bombarding a force with nuisance calls. 

He dials 999 before rapping to operators at Greater Manchester Police - who are not allowed to cut him off.

Despite officers blocking more than 60 SIM cards, the man has plagued them since January 2009.

Police said the man "has made thousands of calls where he chants, sings, raps, preaches and plays loud music to call handlers".

In the past three months he has made 700 calls, lasting between three and five minutes, slowing down the call handlers' response to other calls.


During many of the calls, the operator answers the phone to be met with a barrage of music and rants.

His rapping is difficult to decipher but during one call he started shouting about his citizen's rights.

"Not allowed to cut him off"? Genius! Maybe not the most receptive audience, emergency call handlers, but you never know. Probably beats setting up another MySpace, anyway.

Audio (from Channel 4's coverage:)
- Call one: emergency call centre deals with rapper
- Call two: rapper calls for citizens rights

Tuesday, 22 June 2010

30KB – "The Anthem" (Onra)

The anthem (30kb ver.) by Article10

Diss1 (me) and Dastardly from 30KB chatting some thoughts on flags, anthems, nationalism, etc. over "The Anthem" by ace Parisian beatmaker Onra.

"The Anthem", incidentally, was also remade to feature in a Coca-Cola ad for the 2008 Beijing Olympics, though their vision of global unity seems mainly to involve Yao Ming and LeBron James guiding a load of national stereotypes in a really half-arsed battle before toasting each other with soft drinks. Also, the version of the track they used is much inferior, because Onra hadn't cleared the samples from the original and thus they had a musicologist replay everything (by the end, nothing Onra actually did was left on the track). It just doesn't have the right bounce or swagger to it.

If you like the beat, try his 2007 album Chinoiseries, which is all made from sampled Vietnamese and Chinese records (Onra himself is of Vietnamese descent). This is probably the best track on it to these ears, although that's not to say the rest are slacking by any means.

If you like our group, you can check us at Bandcamp, Facebook, MySpace, etc. (Bandcamp is best for listening).

[30,000 Leagues] Dancehall feat. Ava Leigh

<a href="">Dancehall feat. Ava Leigh by 30KB</a>

On a personal level, i have a great deal of affection for this one. Not sure why, particularly. The recurring presence of John Prescott is probably something to do with it.

["John Prescott"] *I can't help it, I'm a ladies' man. Now, who wants a punch?*

[diss1] We smash a silent prism. Rhythm fill up the schism. They got a warrant on this recidivist lyricism. i'm feeling sorta hyper. Somebody pass a lighter. i filter flowing through a tetrahydro- sorta cypher. Step to the stage, we *punch* like John Prescott. See for yourself just how much better the best got. Just try and keep the beat. Hold on to your receipt. Murder mystery weekend silencer, guest shot.
[AcheZen Pains] A cool belated structure from disjunction as a tool, refuse it. Life lesson and rule: stop, look and listen to music. Cut the wacky sample, as a result you forfeit and lose this. Old school like pterodactyl, prehistoric tune abusers. We bring the new ish, the first thing on your wishlist. The last door to break the knocking hand of the last Jehovah's Witness. Picking the seams for indifference, it's gotta be somebody's business. A hobby tree of commodity, as ugly as you are ambitious. Will this mocking stop? Nah, it's gonna last forever. Spit a nasty fluid, evil like I got a mad vendetta. But you've got to get better because nobody likes your flows. Attack and make your lungs collapse through panic. That's the way it goes. When sober, drunk or stoned, grip tight to microphone, sniff the stuff I'm smoking will leave you with a bleeding nose. Don't get me wrong though, in case misunderstood: I am an artist, but I won't draw blood.

[chorus] We take the mic and we strive
30,000 fly solutions to the problems of staying alive
Disposing of hot-zone clones
*Two turntables and a fuckin' microphone!*

We take the stage and we soar
30,000 rise-to-the-occasions for the problems of keeping it raw
Careful with that thing when you're passin'...
*Who's the microphone assassin?*

[AZP] Our lilt's a little lighter, Slim Pickens riding bombs. Flow like a "Beatslope" biter, warm-up phenomenon. Now what the hell's he on? We struck a light chord. For years we take from tears until it appears unclear what we fight for. I write more, that's lesson one from ampheta-metatron. Stomp cities like I'm Megalon, pity what I'm stepping on. The weapon's on, the weapon's aimed and with that grows the guessing game. Solutions for some second fame, we're shooting for a better day.
[diss1] 30K is sort of like the new H5N1. Smartest guys in the room, more so than Enron, cuz when a plan go wrong it's not our names on the paper. Already ducked out the back door saying "see ya later!" Second-rate caterers savour lame shit, we on some future tip like "get these motherfucking snakes off my spaceship!" Eject 'em out the airlock. In space, nobody can hear you hiss... ultimate Dolby noise reduc for those who diss [*one!*] Tranquility shattered down to splinters. Style with the bile to turn your nuclear fams to nuclear winters, and when Chernobyl savages hunter/gather the wilderness for dinner i'll claim squatter's rights on the podium of the winner. Check it: back to the city's lights sober. In the overpass, spirits linger in the air like an odour of cheap perfume, piss and chip fat. And this town... is coming like Pripyat.

Delusionists – "Digital Connects" video

This one was a song-of-the-day last month, and now Delusionists have only gone and made a video for it! i also have a complete set of lyrics so you can peep the sheer amount of smart blog/website references in them while Ben, DBF and Slim Pickens guide you around the track in moody/arty black'n'white.

This rap shit Beats Laying About, so I had to take a minute dedicated a shout,
To every Hip Hop Connection Digital direction providers
Who act like a Sensei and guide us.
Through these Hip Hop Chronicles of Riddick like Vin Diesel
U-Music buffs must have been puffing them Cocaine Blunts (just a quick toke),
Hip Hop Isn’t Dead, nah it just eloped to the Big Smoke.
Believe the Hip Hop Hype Dog,
If you ain’t heard of us you ain’t checking for the right blog.
Oh Word? You never heard the fly chatter
Of a Bonafide nutter on a Certified Banger?
My Style43 times nanger than most,
To redefine The Meaning of Dope rhyme patterns and quotes.
The Underground Strikes Back from the great depression
With Bare Beats in them Basement Sessions.
You might hear one or 2DopeBoyz
No Airs N Graces and prone to make noise
Like “mate what you want!?!” Stay Blatantly Blunt
Pushing UKHH straight to the front (that’s us!).
Repping UK All Day,
Be careful ‘cause Life Just Bounces away
When you play with Vocal Swords that slaughter chumps,
Better Wake Your Daughter Up, if that bitch is sleeping.
Had to switch to a Different Kitchen,
‘Cause the raw Unkut left the kitchen reeking.
With something different to these drug-obsessed amateurs
And only push dope via Suspect Packages.
(Yeah) And the beat plays on
And we don’t stop rocking ‘til the DJ Gone (gone).
God willing we can make Top Billin’ Above Ground
Without dumbing down to a club sound.
Strictly Independant, my brothers and me
And you can hit the button marked RWD
And you’ll agree that it’s wack, Nah Right, shit’s Fat
Lace lyrics with links just to give love back
To all the digital connects.

Oh, and not only that, but should you fancy copping the album after hearing this (totally worth it i'd say), you can get 25% off the download of our album by using the code DIGIFAM at

Sunday, 20 June 2010

[30,000 Leagues] Meet Is What I Like to Eet

<a href="">Meet Is What I Like to Eet by 30KB</a>

Wherein AZP delivers incisive, meaningful lyrics about animal rights extremists, and i chat shit about breakfast foods for 16 bars. Contrary to popular belief, the misspelling in the title is deliberate, although no-one can really remember why.

[chorus: both plus Boron Tabernacle Choir]
30,000 Bastards...

[AcheZen Pains] Hold up! A prime cut from these 30,000 nuts. If you're allergic, watch us work your open mouth until it has to shut. Drinking from the cup with Super Saiyan spontaneity. In sync with linguistics, heaven sent like call me deity. May I? ["OUI!"] You can call us monastic: word play's the religion against the merit of rigid scholastics. Take Vs without asking on some premier robber tricks. Don't grasp what we giving? Go sit on the hat of Obelix. Now he's rocking it, it's ALL animal tested. i'm Pro-Test and PETA should have their bones dug up and sequestered. Direct the vets to the exits. Lack of a logic protecting this. Some of the scariest things in the world are the anti-vivisectionists. Now he's wrecking it! But all for medicinal purposes. Nurture this, unleash the worth as it dissipates from surfaces. A discourteous earful of self-destructive skirmishes. Playground thoughts and tactics with an abundance of worthlessness.


[diss1] Le passé est passé. Le présent est présent. L'avenir est à venir. And so we have another year to let the beat dangle off the precipice. i got to pay attention to my head and like that druid, get a fix. Don't bother trynna flavour porridge with them sweetener sticks, you'll just end up with a mess like waiting too long for Weetabix. Meet is what i like to eet yo, i want bacon by the rasher, black pudding and pork sausages after. Most important meal of the day: i leave space to eat rappers for afters with metaphors by the platter and apple sauce relish in my side dish. It's a delicacy. Don't believe me? Ask the chef: he'll say ["OUI!"]. i made the beat, and i'll make a meal too. The top of the food chain, enjoying the view. It's the feeding of the 30K, superfly catering. It's all art, no artificial flavouring.


Saturday, 19 June 2010

[30,000 Leagues] Carnival of Horrors

<a href="">Carnival of Horrors by 30KB</a>

[AcheZen Pains] Under the rock, a man snaps his own arm off with the precedent to end the gruel. Under the hammer, our ex-prime minister-slash-president plays the fool. What we've got here is a new reign of old fear, the irony of tyranny. It's all too cruel. Forget latter headlines with some imagery. Oh, you missed it? Go check YouTube. Too rude to tell me what to think, if you missed it click on another link to the brink of a meme over cryptic. Politics a trick and the voters went and missed it. Our death clocks reading 20:11, no time for dissatisfaction. Hands behind backs still holding a weapon, ejecting the world while nobody's strapped in. No joke delivered, here today and gone tomorrow when this country's built on smoke and mirrors and the crowd go "oh! the horror!" The media gets greedier, inbreeding facts mislead the mass until we cannot face the fact that we're the warhead-onists. Trick the readers to agree with gracious interveners - a theme of stopping screams, a clever twist for the supremacists. Making us believe that news writers aren't the terrorists. No distinction from the fact and fiction - are we getting this?

[chorus: either or both]
A kingdom full of doubting cuz it's not our vote they're counting
and now it's all over bar the shouting. ("Where's the exit?")
('Way before the metal detectors and barbed wire')
Can't see the trees for the forest fire ("What we left with?")

[diss1] Neat how the best fall. Peet lace the beat like Pulp Fiction adrenaline shot directly through the chest wall. This twisted little personal Hallelujah Chorus got us blowing up the road like driving Fallujah tourbus. Land of the barbed wire, car bomb and grenade, where they tear down the statues for the ticker-tape parade and you can die whether you're a hero or coward, and if the vote changed anything they wouldn't allow it. i subjected them to tests and found them lacking and some see it as just evolution's function. Tho as always, it depends on who you're asking. Dunno if Darwin was counting on mass destruction. When the beast beneath the surface came bursting through the cervix the John Hurt Alien nation discovered purpose, and it can only lead to an impending disaster. i'm in the carnival of horrors with demented ringmaster.


[AZP] As another channel changes with the banging of a different drum, commercial bursts of focus work on where we get our wisdom from. Lurking with the hopeless, working till it chokes us, difficult when the rhetorician brokers with the expositional.
[d1] This track is like Runaway Mine Train freak decapitation, too bloody for your radio station. Beats make crowds frenzy like the crack of a whip. We can outstrip anything that you're travelling with.
[AZP] Beauty's in the ear of the beholder and my ears, they burn volition. Listen to the deceit from the older cheap seats, Britain... truth is, duty's only skin deep, and these politicians got a skin condition when their sin speaks...
[d1] ...when their sin speaks volumes like audiobooks. Tell stories with hooks, could leave your day spoiled like too many cooks. A 7% solution: instant brain intrusion. The track's fusion, hip-hop ain't noise pollution.


Sunday, 13 June 2010

"To whom... speed means freedom of the soul."

"Kowalski drives to drive, with no real purpose for doing what he's doing. He decides to give his own life its definition and meaning, with complete freedom over his actions."

Transcribing the lyrics to "N.W.W.", i remembered what a great film Vanishing Point is. 
It quickly became clear at least two of my group had never seen it before. We are remedying this now.

[30,000 Leagues] N.W.W. feat. Living Larceny

<a href="">NWW feat. Living Larceny by 30KB</a>

Cowboy anthem. Featuring Living Larceny who now goes by a different name and is a proper group member. Produced by Artikal-10 who goes by the same name and is also a proper member.

[diss1] 30K flow on some Wild North West script - more of a mystic tip than a Will Smith flick. Future mil sellers, never box office poison. When Artikal drops the beat, we bring the noise in. Cop siren synth make me wanna smoke up some George Lucas. The badlands are wired with computers. Mad losers lost to the thuggery. This is wild NW shit, the good, bad and ugg-er-ly.
[Living Larceny] Oh! Heaven forbid we should try and live positive. Cuz north-west got me sick with its politics. No optimist, this is one you should miss off your tourbook. 30KB with that raw hook. Bad luck to see a place so desecrated. Addiction, most of the Wirral eradicated by Merseyside's finest. Rhymes full of metaphors, knowledge and the odd one-liners.

[chorus: all] Cuz this is how we do it in the North Wild West
Spitting raw shit till our very last breath
Beats by our side in case you haven't guessed
Streets of the blessed, just check the address

[AcheZen Pains] Rap this sipping on the juice of a cactus. North where your horse probably hasn't got a tax disc. Back in the throne of the brand of the underneath, cone in the hand full of high grade tumbleweed. Cowboys wanna kick off? Try and embarrass me. Warcry "HIP-HOP", scalping guaranteed. Savagery the stander of a wrangler attackin 'em. North wild west, mate - this mohawk ain't an accident.
[LL] Larceny speaks diction with an outlaw mindframe. 23 years to my name, dope like John Wayne. El Mariachi! North-west Wirral apache, gingerbredraaan but you can't catch me. I'm way ahead of my time, way ahead of your crew (still at the starting line). Aren't even worth putting on my roster. North-western, that's why i keep my weed in my holster.

[chorus: all]

[d1] Heaven forbid we should try and live more than this. Call me Kowalski on some break-for-the-border shit. Cuz while some of these kids follow cosy trails, others carry more heat than Josey Wales. (It goes...) Once upon a time on the edge of a country, they nurtured a movement and called it funky, and when haters started hating when that shit took off, they said "this town ain't big enough for the both, so fuck off."
[AZP] Unbidden I get vocal from my fear, yo. Many fiddling to a burning Rome like they Nero. Thirty thousand focal pointing at this local hero. Keep that ear low to the floor - I challenge you all to a draw. You can find me through the saloon door. Chop the bow and arrows with significant force and then try spitting some more. It's the magnificent four. It's not a wild guess, you know the wild west from the north.

Friday, 11 June 2010

[30,000 Leagues] Beat the Rich

<a href="">Beat the Rich by 30KB</a>

The beat for this was sample from a segment on the Michael Moore show The Awful Truth. It's alright, though, he's cool with that sort of thing.

[diss1] 30,000 detonators primed to go off in your face, as the crew that you never knew blew the doors and stepped right into the place armed with the special abilities, strength and agility plus bulletproof like Kevlar®. Let the sub-bass sound out a clarion call so we can locate where the heads are. Don't give a fuck what you're trynna tell me cuz i learn like an autodidact. You better tell your crew to secure-it-ass or else likely you'll get hijacked. Beat the rich for artistic merit, rejecting the bling mindset, and send undercooked rappers back to the grill cuz they know it's not their time yet. (Yo) simply don't know what we might do. Told you last time that i don't like you, and you can assume that goes for my crew, ready for level-up evolution like Raichu. Each track a winner – keep the score, please. Jon cuts so much we call him Voorhees. Wannabes pray to AcheZ, receive sore knees, enemies bombed like ["1940s"]. Watch what you're doing with that beat, matey! This for those that ain't moved their feet lately. Counsellors calling out "Artikal crazy!" (nah – just smoked too much weed, maybe.) 1 for the talent, 2 for the freakshow, 3 goes to the other Northern Alliance. 4 for the flow, 5 for the way the beat go, 30KB drop science (on your head).

[AcheZen Pains] A simple cystic sign of fear comes. It's not a bass kick, it's the banging of your eardrums. Turn out from animals and edify the fierce crumbs, til when the cheer numbs, and what you hear stuns. The market makers making everything attractive hindered information that's arriving so refracted. Your imagination's overactive. Syndicating songs til overplaying simply passed it. Chooned in to listen: all i heard was static. Take it, grab it, thirty thousand caskets, these days DJs need them through infection - that's why we call them radioactive. And it's a classic, we be laughing rapid. Your style's pH-neutral, we dissolve you like an acid. A clear form of collective defiance. We know the revolution has got to be financed. So beat 'em or join 'em, the rich or the lenders ever offending your secret agendas. You got money? Come try sue me. Your style's uglier than Wayne Rooney, and more embarrassing than Richard is to Judy. i got the message like you can call me *Ruuuuuuuuudie*... you'll soon see why you wanna honour me. The difference between the followers and wannabes. Sire golden victims like i'm fighting Mr Connery. Monetary in snobbery, we do it for the robber's fee, and its a robbery – sound the alert. Nobody truths, all bodies get hurt. M.i.A - rusting penny verse. The great bank holiday to toughen stirling turf. A poor opinion lost in a vote non-official. The end got its funding; all that matters is fiscal.

Thursday, 10 June 2010

Rahsaan Roland Kirk plays three saxes, flute at once

Pretty self-explanatory title here. There was a video on YouTube recently of RRK performing "Making Love After Hours" in Norway in 1967, but some copyright miser got it taken down.

This one's almost as good, notwithstanding the weird interludes featuring clips of old-timey cars and a guy at the end interrupting the music to complain about people who interrupt music by talking over it.

edit > some of "Making Love After Hours" appears as the second part of this video, including the excellent nose flute break and the bit where he sounds like he's gobbing furiously into the flute.

Thom Yorke slightly disingenuous on the future of the music business

"He advises musicians to self-release music rather than yearn for a major label contract, suggesting the loss of the mainstream music industry will be "no great loss to the world.""

Radiohead discography
* Pablo Honey (1993, EMI)
* The Bends (1995, EMI)
* OK Computer (1997, EMI)
* Kid A (2000, EMI)
* Amnesiac (2001, EMI)
* Hail to the Thief (2003, EMI)

i guess it helps if you get yr highly profitable and critically acclaimed major label stint in before you have to start self-releasing, huh.

Wednesday, 9 June 2010

Song of the day: #11 Scams – "Lost for Words"

My pals in Scams have a new album coming soon with a load of new songs and suchlike. This one comes with one of the ace found-media videos the group have done so well in the past, where the themes of vocabulary and the limits of expression are reflected solely through edited clips from the educational literacy/numeracy cartoons that used to turn up in Sesame Street. It's PBS-tastic.

"Lost for Words" and another new one, "Helicopter Parents", can also be heard at the band's Facebook and Myspace pages as of now.

Tuesday, 8 June 2010

Song of the day: #10 Dutch Uncles – "Fabio Acapella"

If we must have World Cup records, they should be like this one from Manchester indie types Dutch Uncles, the most conceptually awesome effort i've heard this tournament. It sounds a wee bit like John Cage scoring a potential England XI starting line-up, which is clearly amazing.

My favourite thing about it is the way the whole idea for the song seems to have been suggested by the title pun, with the music being worked out to fit that. i'm a total sucker for that kind of conceptual rigour.

Shame about Rio Ferdinand at 0:27, but you can't win 'em all.

Listen and/or download at Dutch Uncles' Soundcloud:
  Fabio Acapella by Dutch Uncles

[30,000 Leagues] Toleracist 2008

The number refers to the fact that there was an earlier, demo, version. Give or take a few songs Jake (AcheZen) and East (producer Article 10) recorded together, this is pretty much the first thing we ever did.

<a href="">Toleracist 2008 by 30KB</a>

[AcheZen Pains/Adbuster Keaton] A dedication to no one - an open letter to the broken we're stepping on. Smoke in my eye too close to the melting pot.Think some trouble bubbling, our weapon men are selling shots. Hell in box high blows. John Wayne syndrome with G.I. Joes. Think this action figure's lost, battling with eyes closed. Triggers cost written off less about the Toy Story, more than war upon our witness box, shocking awe and glory. Civil text next sold views faux origins. ("This is the news!") What headlines are we following? Borrowing horror themes no one should be honouring, no hovering. Our culture colour's Neopolitan. So why you looking bothered? We all share the same origins. Optimum humanist, new to this, offering objection. Don't tell us who's a risk without us asking any questions. Ride the insurrection with inner city bickering. Button's been pushed: countdown imminent. Crushed in the panic, bust warning light flickering. Burn up in the heated words, burnt because of bickering. A harsh realm rising, who are we to hide it? The subtleties of stating in debate we're undecided. Vitriol inside turns to people you're despising; blinding hate makes this toleracist island. i'm finding the blinkers blurring out such atrophy. It's raining on our cardboard canopy. Fuck the start war anywhere, any time attitude - that's not sanity.

[diss1] *{cheaper global warming now!}*
*{tax the ozone, not the motorist!}*
*{free dead Iraqi with every tank!}*

[AZP]{d1} No force unstoppable, topple down the core of it. When war's so profitable we're gonna see much more of it. Bored of them distorting it, swayed on bait assumptions. Everybody's talking, only few are saying something. Some reporting on reporting but we just keep walking. Placating easy targets that they think is rewarding. Resorting to a message like the rest to be bought out when they're only gonna say the words that they haven't thought out. A warcloud, thunder storm approaching, provoking, ignoring what's important when the record's broken. No choking (it's gone two bars). And while it's out, it's time to re-examine our scars. Vernacular, and reality beckons. Bite it in the bud and put the needle on the record. A wrecking to put the voices in check. How can any cause such damage while demanding the respect? Without our civil liberties there's nothing to protect. Is this on? {Direct.} Can you see me? {Yep.} Coming live from a time that we'll never forget.

[d1] {AZP} The toleracist is a term we apply to anyone who witnesses but turns a blind eye to the smear campaign waged daily by those with their fingers on the buttons of the media controls. Play to the gallery, establish a consensus. Take care you only ever prey on the defenceless. Afflict the comfortable, comfort the afflicted? {Is there a moral there somewhere?} - Know what? i think we missed it. Take the heat off themselves, so they rock a blame-shift to the people with no mouthpiece to clear their name with - refugees, Muslims, people on benefits. Credit where it's due, the scheme is one of rare elegance. It takes intelligence and a finely-honed bullshit detector to see past the lies they fed ya. Toleracist standard: deify Tony Martin, leave Satpal Ram to rot behind bars, no pardon. What's the problem, is Asian self-defence worse than a half-mad cracker with a shotgun? Laughable sentence thanks to expensive lawyers' word skill, then the press treat this dick like the new Churchill. Seems you've only got to kill someone to get glory... so let's flip the coin for the tail of the story. Sunday night, Satpal's in the curry house, trying to sit back, chill, eat some food, drive the worry out. Group of pissed white thugs wanna start shit - "six of us, one of you. Safe lads, easy target!" Braindead drunk fuckheads try and act manly, six on one with the brain in the fist. Rip shirts like "you won't like me when i'm angry!" Half a dozen of 'em make it hard to resist. Satpal's in his pocket, now he's packing a Stanley from the job that he took to provide for his family. Comes in handy: two cuts to the neck puts the pisshead off his balance, lays him down on the deck. Now the ambulance here, take 'em both to A&E. Attacker demonstrates again what a dick he can be: Satpal gets stitched up, goes home free; this guy abuses the staff and oulls out his IV like "i'm not getting treated by a female!" Fact that she was keeping him alive was the overlooked detail. System gave up when he went into shock like "i'm afraid we've lost him..." Now it's Ram in the dock, and it's self-defence on a charge of murder. A voice in the wilderness (nobody heard ya). Witness statements 'lost in translation'. Judge overseer run a tight plantation. Lack of patience from the same red tops run by white-collar criminals paying bent cops, cruising in their fly yachts round Hawai'ian sunspots. (*Richard Desmond* - preach morals, profit offa cumshots). Murdoch: your papers promote division to divert focus from your Stalinist revision. This isn't cynicism (so where's the WMD?) You tell me - they look cooked up previously Blue Peter style, anthrax and sticky-back plastic. Stick on the front page ("that's fantastic!") So the bovine masses swallow beef willingly. Lack of thought rots grey matter worse than BSE. But some of us are still not so easy to mislead... still don't believe everything that you read.

[AZP] Only fools and forces waste their times on opinions that save them the strength and expense of thinking. Enough is enough. Disruptive reluctance, take that giftwrapped bomb and admit it's destructive. Much of a much, corruption disgusts this Adbuster Keaton. Come hell or high water, i sense it's just a little bit of history repeating.

Monday, 7 June 2010

BP chief receives support from unexpected quarter

Original pic by Charlie Riedel, via Worthy captioning by me. 
This is one of the only pics of Deepwater wildlife casualties anywhere, for reasons which quickly became apparent.

Song of the day: #9 B. Dolan – "R.S.V.P."

On the day an Indian court sentenced eight executives to rather pitiful sentences for the 1984 Bhopal Disaster, it seems relevant to air B. Dolan's calling-out of Union Carbide's CEO Warren Anderson, which even provides several addresses for Anderson should anyone wants to write to him and ask him what the fuck he's playing at.

The gas leak at Bhopal killed 2,259 people immediately, with the death toll ultimately rising to 3,787. Some estimate up to 25,000 have died as a result to date, and estimates for total exposure are up to 500,00.

Because of the time delay in bringing convictions, the maximum penalty for the seven living executives that were convicted1 is two years' imprisonment and a fine of about £1,500. Warren Anderson, meanwhile, fled India in 1984 after his initial arrest, and has therefore got away scot free with his part in history's worst industrial accident by just deciding he's not all that interested in being prosecuted. Which must be lovely for him. i'm sure Tony Hayward has already erected a small shrine to his chutzpah.

Thanks to the homie Buddy Peace, who mixed this track's parent CD, for the track hook-up.

1 The other one conveniently gets to serve his sentence in the afterlife.

Sunday, 6 June 2010

Song of the day: #8 earthtone9 – "Tat Twam Asi"

i'm still kind of ambivalent about bands reforming as a rule, but it's definitely better when it's amazing bands and/or those who were underappreciated the first time round (i'm still not condoning, say, The Who playing live with only two original members or whatever).

This year's been pretty great for amazing and underappreciated reformations so far: first Godspeed You! reassembled and even get to curate their own ATP, and now the almighty earthtone9, without doubt my favourite metal group ever, have got back together as well!

Staggeringly slept-on first time round, it's now been ten years since the Nottingham group released their best and final full-length arc'tan'gent, which mixed proper dirty riffing with calmer, reflective passages, wonderful soaring melodies with brutal screaming. Vocalist Karl Middleton (also of The Blueprint, Twin Zero, Blackstorm) is to my mind one of the best in the whole rock game.

These days their albums are as rare as dog parachutes, but the band have helpfully put together a freely downloadable career-spanning greatest hits package entitled Inside Embers Glow and available from to prime the unfamiliar for their return. i'd recommend it as an ace collection even if, like me, you've already got all the records.

There's only one planned live date at the moment, at Damnation Festival in Leeds, but with any luck they'll play a full tour before much longer.

"Tat Twam Asi", from arc'tan'gent and also featured on the compilation, is maybe the quintessential et9 song, featuring both the broodingly melodic and full-on furious sides of the band inside five minutes, as well as the sort of questing/reflective lyricism they regularly explored.

mp3: earthtone9 – "Tat Twam Asi" (YSI)

Israel, Gaza blockade and the flotilla: cartoon

Conceptualized by Dorian Lynskey, facilitated by me, drawn by Cliff Lipp (Flickr).
More of Lipp's political/editorial stuff at his newly-instituted Tumblr The World Political.

Saturday, 5 June 2010

[30,000 Leagues] Fuck 'em If They Can't Take a Joke feat. Ava Leigh

High time i put up some more lyrics from the first 30KB album. This one's fairly self-explanatory really.

<a href="">Fuck 'em If They Can't Take a Joke feat. Ava Leigh by 30KB</a>

[diss1] This is not a haiku. i don't need elaborate rhyme schemes to say i don't like you.1 And this is not a protest song, just a chance to answer back to those who hate and deliberately get us wrong. Purposeful misinterpretation shows we got 'em so nervous they must devise lies and slanders to obscure our true purpose. But verses shatter curses: the sword's still less mighty than the mic. Cypher frenzy read the final rites to biter-friendly psyche. Stick that on your front page. Fight me? i might let you if you ask me nicely. Defiant bratty gladiator on some Karate Kid/kung fu death trip shit. That's my 'fuck you' prerequisite. Human Newton's third on some gross exaggeration station making haters wish their disses were retractable: that's laughable. Really thought they could step to us and not get smoked? I say:

*{"Fuck 'em... if they can't take a joke"}*

[AcheZen Pains] This is not a tanka. i don't think i need five lines and 31 syllables just to call you a... *ahem* Taking the time to trample the lines and run 'em right into your face. Dancing the beat like Kelly, taking you out before you've said Grace. A tender heart, broke, ripped apart and rendered ruthless, fruitless juices, easy bruises take offence. i see your brain is useless and then we get off and leave you for dead. See, that's our destination. [ssssshhhhhhhhh] It's gone right over their head! Fun is made to poke with cheeky motive if it's easy to provoke it. Fuck 'em if they can take a joke. And did anyone here even notice the river they drank from is dry? My name is Intelligent Thought, you killed my father, prepare to die. DIY style, like my name is Inigo Montoya. Turn me into 3D, i'll still be Doctor Claw's destroyer. Like some cartoon bloke.

*{"Fuck 'em... if they can't take a joke"}*

[sample parade]

[d1] Round three! We leave the water parted when we sail through. Don't expect a reprieve because your sense of humour's failed you. When the beat kicks in you can't offend me. Already tap-danced straight past you like Fred Astaire crack frenzy.
[AZ] Smoke green with envy, joker friendly, black and blue repainters. The jury have come to a verdict: *everybody hates yer!*... A confiding, just for your information...
[d1] The house that you reside in's built on sand foundation. Big Bad Wolf, takedown. Never met a rule i didn't like (to break). If somebody says 'no' it usually shows you which way to take.
[AZ] So we make and shake the brake and broke you all intentionally. Think this sample's out of time? It's – meant – to – be. Concede each day you're at a loss so mark it as a fixture.
[d1] We strike twice before you can hit us once - cuz we predict yer. Now you caught a fierce diss and wanna come and try and suck up, well here's my word of advice to you, yeh?

*{"Shut the fuck up!"}*

30KB Sting — Welcome to Nothing feat. Ava LeighToleracist 2008Fuck 'em If They Can't Take a Joke feat. Ava Leigh — Care Less feat. Ava Leigh — NWW feat. Living LarcenyBeat the RichMeet Is What I Like to EetCarnival of HorrorsDancehall feat. Ava LeighCrewd Sons (Ghost in the Machine)

1 This couplet by Matthew John Tudor Jones.

Friday, 4 June 2010

Fucked-up email

Got this today from a splitter hitwoman (a splitwoman?). Maybe like a female take on John Cusack in the movie Grosse Pointe Blank. i suppose that means it could actually be someone who can't bring herself to kill me cuz she still holds a candle for me. To be fair, i have been out with some people who could feasibly have been secret assasssins.

(i don't know anyone named Kathy Yarbrough, so i'm guessing this is a comandeered email address.)

Fucking weird, tho.

From: Tick Tock (

Medium riskYou may not know this sender.Mark as safe|Mark as junk
Sent: 04 June 2010 06:57:53
          This is the only way I could contact you for now,I want you to be very careful about this and keep this secret with you until I make out space for us to see. You have no need of knowing who I am or where I am from.I know this may sound very surprising to you but it’s the situation.I have been paid some ransom in advance to terminate you with some reasons listed to me by my employer. It’s someone I beleive you call a friend, I have followed you closely for a while now and have seen that you are innocent of the accusations he leveled against you. Do not contact the police or try to send a copy of this to them,because if you do, I will know,and I might be pushed to do what I have been paid to do.Besides, this is the ist time I turn out to be a betrayer in my job.I took pity on you,that is why I have made up my mind to help you if you are willing to help yourself.

Now listen,I will arrange for us to see face to face,but before that, I need $30,000. I will come to your home or you determine where you wish we meet; I repeat, do not arrange for the cops and if you play hard to get, it will be extended to your family.Do not set any camera to cover us or set up any tape to record our conversation, my employer is in my control now. Payment details will be provided for you to make a part payment of $15,000 first,which will serve as gurantee that you are ready to you co-orperate,then i will post a copy of the video tape that contains his request for me to terminate you which will be enough evidence for you to take any legal action against him before he employs another person for the job. You will pay the balance of $15,000 once you receive the tape.

Warning: do not contact the police, make sure you stay indoors once it is 7.30pm until this whole thing is sorted out,if you neglect any of these warnimgs, you will have yourself to blame. You do not have much time, so get back to me immediately.

Note: I will advise you keep this to yourself alone, not even a friend or a family member should know about it because it could be one of them. 

Tick Tock.